EDINBURGH 2023: Patrick Susmilch Q&A

BWW caught up with Patrick Susmilch to chat about bringing Texts From My Dead Friends to the 2023 Edinburgh Festival Fringe.

Tell us a bit about Texts From My Dead Friends.

 It’s about all my dead friends and the texts we’ve exchanged. It’s also a self-deprecating retrospective of my life and the foibles of my youth. It’s a celebration of growth and the friendships we have that transcend even death. Plus there are memes.

Why did you want to share this story?

I created this show to help others to feel seen. After my best friend’s death in 2019, my mind was obliterated with grief. On the outside, however, I looked fine and was treated like I was fine. This dissonance made me feel invisible. Like a ghost haunting my own life. Reading about other people’s grief in books like, “The Year of Magical Thinking” and “A Grief Observed” helped me feel less alone. Hopefully, I can help someone the same way those books helped me.

Is it difficult when the material is so personal?

It can be! The night before the first time I performed this show, I had a panic attack at a party where I was beginning to disassociate from my body. Thankfully, a very nice friend was there and rubbed my back and helped me calm down. Get friends who will rub your back.

I’ve had to practice certain parts of the show more than others to desensitize myself.

With this being your Edinburgh debut, do you think you know what to expect from the Fringe?

I have no idea what to expect! Everyone I know who has had a Fringe show says it’s extremely fun, so I’m looking forward to that. Plus, everyone who gets famous, right?

What would you like audiences to take away from the show?

Well, for those experiencing grief, I want them to feel seen. For those who have yet to experience grief, I want them to know that’s its ok to be destroyed when it happens. Western society frowns on people who vocalize their grief, but I’m here to tell you that it’s okay.

Patrick Susmilch debut stand up show ‘Texts From My Dead Friends’ is at Just The Tonic @ The Mash House – Cask Room at 3.20pm from 3rd – 27th August (except 14th) for tickets go to www.edfringe.com

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