By saying yes to your career all the time, you’re in turn saying no to every other aspect of your life.
“If you’re asked to do something, the answer is always yes.” This is a phrase that actors hear often. If a director asks you if you can do a dialect? Yes. If a choreographer asks for volunteers? Yes. And most importantly, if a team asks if you’re available on certain dates, the answer is always yes.
In fact, I can recall certain instances where actors have bent over backward trying to make themselves available, whether that means calling out of work several times a week so they could attend callbacks or planning their vacations based on when auditions are slow. I even know of people who have skipped out on going to weddings. At one point, I even canceled and rebooked flights, just so that I could be a part of a project. That amount of dedication to your career is admirable, but it can also be overwhelming and unsustainable.
At some point, you need to start living for yourself, regardless of how that impacts your auditioning and performing schedule. But in a career where so little is in your control, you don’t want the other parts of your life to impact your chance to get in the room. When you get a callback or even a job offer, it can feel awful to jeopardize those opportunities in any way. I’m going on a super long vacation soon, and when I was scheduling it, I got super nervous about not being available if an opportunity were to come up. The fear of missing out on any potential career advances made me nervous to plan this amazing trip. This isn’t the first time this has happened, either.
The frustrating reality is that by going on a trip, attending a wedding, or saying no for any reason, you could miss out on some opportunities. Admittedly, by choosing to travel over staying in New York in September, I missed out on a couple of auditions that I was super right for. However, by saying yes to your career all the time, you’re in turn saying no to every other aspect of your life. Rest is important. Spending time with family and friends is vital. Closing those doors all the time just for the sake of availability as a performer is not healthy. Time is precious, and how we choose to spend our time is everything. By no means should you invest your time in other aspects of your life if those things aren’t important to you. However, understanding work-life balance is key.
As scary as it can be to take time away from the hustle of being an actor, I promise you that what is meant for you will come. The audition that you missed out on will be back next year, and the role that you know you’re right for will come back around at another theatre. Being a performer is incredible, but it is not always worth sacrificing valuable life experiences. There is more to life than auditioning and booking jobs. As scary as it can be to lose some control, it is okay to not always be available.
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