Student Blog: Letting Go of Doubt In Order to Succeed

At the start of my freshman year, I didn’t get involved in any clubs or organizations, even though I had always been involved in several extracurricular activities at a time since elementary school and Temple has plenty of music and theater performance clubs. At the time, I was feeling insecure about my theater abilities and I was worried I would not get into any if I auditioned, so I just did not audition at all.

I decided to switch gears a little and try something different that did not require an audition— directing. My roommate had told me about a student organization called Temple Theater Side Stage, a club that produces student-run plays. Side Stage posted on Instagram that they were looking for directors for the Ben Vargas Short Stuff Festival which showcases student written short plays. Even though I had never been in a play (I only had done musical theater before) and had no directing experience, I figured that everybody has to start somewhere. I was elated when I got chosen to direct a show called Juicy, a play influenced by the internet rumors surrounding an alleged relationship between Harry Style and Lizzo back in 2019. It was a bit challenging because the show was on Zoom because of the pandemic, but somehow I pulled it off. That’s when I first discovered my love for directing. 

However, I did start to miss performing and decided to send in a self tape video to a club called Broadway on Broad, lovingly referred to as BoB by its members. BoB produces cabaret style performances that each have a theme and include musical theater numbers, sometimes with choreography. I have always been a singer first and while my dancing has improved since freshman year, I was not feeling super confident when I was put into songs that were more dance-heavy. Flash forward to the end of my sophomore year when I ran for the Executive Board and I was chosen to do Public Relations, which mainly included running the clubs Instagram account. In the fall, I volunteered to help choreograph a number in the first cabaret even though I did really know what I was doing, but I must have been successful because I was asked to choreograph numbers in the following cabarets as well. Being a member of BoB gave me a multitude of opportunities, not just to perform, but also opportunities in leadership, social media management and choreography. During my time in BoB, I learned to just say yes without second guessing if I was good enough. It was not always easy, but it always got done.

By the time spring of my Junior year rolled around, I was yearning to be in a fully produced musical, and I auditioned and was cast as Betty Blast and understudy for Vi in Footloose, which was produced by By You For You (BYFY), Temple’s student-run musical theater organization. I had never been an understudy before and I was anxious about being able to learn my track. On the day of our first stumble-through, I got an email from the Stage Manager telling me that I was going in as Vi at rehearsal. I was extremely nervous, but I wanted to be as prepared as I could. I dusted off my keyboard and got to work going through Vi’s parts in the music and reviewing the blocking. I was so proud of myself after that rehearsal knowing that I was a fully capable understudy, all I had to do was have faith in myself.

During my time in college, I have come across moments of doubt, when I felt like I was not ready for the opportunities I was presented, but I came to realize that I would not be sent these opportunities if I were not ready for them. It was not always easy, and oftentimes I would have to give myself an extra push, but I was always proud of the outcomes I was able to achieve. I have learned so much from these experiences, but most of all I learned to trust that I can do it!