Review: DRAG QUEENS VS VAMPIRES, Pleasance London

“Friends Don’t Bite” (“It doesn’t pre-empt anything at all”)

Upon entering the theatre for Haus of Dench’s Drag Queens vs Vampires, you are greeted by Kate Butch and Crudi Dench welcoming you to J!zz Airlines, handing out safety cards and showing you to your seats. Throughout this preshow of sorts, Butch and Dench wander around the theatre, ensuring that audience members “have their seatbelts on” and asking whether they would like “chicken or beef” for their meal. 

Once the show itself begins, after a quick lip sync to “Flying the Flag (For You),” it becomes clear as to why we are passengers on a plane. Butch and Dench are travelling to Transylvania, Romania, where they will be representing the UK in Eurovision, the popular European singing competition, which is referred to as “The Gay Olympics.” The pair ended up becoming the representatives after all of their competition “mysteriously” got dysentery.

Upon arriving in Transylvania, however, things take a spooky and supernatural turn when their hotel is revealed to be a castle owned by Dr. Acula the Count (it’s pretty obvious who this doctor really is, but it’s a funny and clever take on the name). Butch soon falls under Dr. Acula’s spell and has a nightmare in which she is bitten by the man - but was it really a dream? As Butch begins getting symptoms that one may consider vampiric - being unable to see their reflection, having a desire to drink blood and hissing in bright lights - Dench realises some surprising truths about her family and her destiny. 

Butch and Dench are a brilliant duo who have incredible banter not only with each other but with the audience, responding to callouts and reacting to different audience reactions (I particularly loved the audience being called “clappy ghosts” throughout). There is quite a bit of audience interaction throughout the show, with one person being chosen to represent Dracula’s “human form,” going on stage and interacting with Butch. During a Eurovision press conference, three audience members are given hats and are told to represent members of the press from France, Germany and Italy leading to some hilarious accents and jokes. 

One of the highlights of the show is when Crudi Dench visits her aunt, Vanessa, played by a puppet and a voiceover. Dench’s acting with the puppet is hilarious, especially in transition moments when the puppet is no longer needed and is quickly discarded on stage.

One of the finest examples of Butch and Dench working perfectly as a duo is when the pair take an online NHS quiz to see if Butch really is a vampire, which leads to some hilarious Twilight references. I won’t go into many spoilers, but in one scene, Dench partakes in some of the most hilariously low-effort training I have ever seen, which nearly had me in tears. 

Ultimately, Drag Queens vs Vampires is a funny and fierce drag show that will have you clapping your hands along with Kate Butch and Crudi Dench, rooting for them in their fight to win Eurovision. 

Drag Queens vs Vampires runs on 15 November at Pleasance London.

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