GLEE: Season 2, Episode 6 - 'Never Been Kissed'

What's going down?

Finn and Sam are both taking a bath after practice, Finn a hot one and Sam a cold one. "How can you stand the cold tub?" Finn asks but Sam says he's used to cold showers dating Quinn. After her babydrama of last year she won't allow him to go any further than making out. Finn empathises as he's been there with Quinn and now with Rachel - "How did we manage to find the only two girls in school who won't put out?" he wonders. When things are getting a little too heavy, Finn just thinks about completely the opposite thing, nearly killing a mailman, and he advises Sam to do the same. Just then Coach Bieste walks in - "Looks like I've found my mailman," he says.

At Glee rehearsal, Puck is back after his time in juvie. Will hopes he's learnt his lesson but Puck
claims that his time in there was a breeze, making him even more of a badass. Will announces to the club their competition for sectionals this year: the all-boys Dalton Academy Warblers and The Hipsters, composed entirely of elderly people. To get them even more psyched for sectionals, he's decided to hold another girls vs boys tournament.

"Relax, I'm here to take care of you," Puck tells Artie as he wheels him down the corridor. Artie is confused, as normally he would be pushing him down the staircase. After being let out of juvie early, he was made to do community service instead and has decided that he is going to be helping Artie. Kurt is still getting grief off Dave Karofsky, as he hurls him into yet another locker and threatens to beat him up. On seeing this, Will calls him into the office and says that he can see the abuse is now starting to get to him, Kurt says that it's simply that the teachers at McKinley are "too quick to let homophobia slide". He also complains that he's no longer challenged here - take doing girls vs boys yet again. In response to this the next day at Glee Will tells them that they're now to perform songs originally sung by the opposite sex - "the more opposite your choice, the more points you get".

Sam and Quinn are making out at hers and when things are again getting too hot and heavy he follows Finn's advice. It works are he imagines Bieste in her underwear carving meat. However things don't go quite to plan, when Quinn asks him to say her name and Bieste's slips out. The next day, Quinn goes to Sue to tell her what happened. She's done all she can to get her rep back up, getting on the Cheerios again, getting straight As and dating the cutest guy in school, "who would rather be humping SheHulk," Sue adds, and doesn't know what more she can do. Sue has a plan, to finally get rid of Bieste and to get Quinn's "Macaulay Culkin stunt double" back in her arms. The plan? Go public with her pain.

Artie wonders why Puck is skiving geometry when he's failing so badly but he's decided to busk
instead. "Cash is king," he tells him. "Watch and learn, young Jedi in a wheelchair," he says as the pair break into a mash-up of "One Love (People Get Ready)". The busking works, as the pair rake in a lot of money from their performance. After, Brittany walks past and Puck notices the way Artie looks at her. He tells him that he wants her back, Puck says it'll be easy as "you only need to be a fraction nice to them" and they'll be yours. Yes, because that isn't sexist at all. Puck suggests a double date with Brittany and Santana at Breadsticks with the money they've got.

Kurt, on the boys' orders, has gone to Dalton Academy to spy on the Warblers. There he meets the devilishly handsome Blaine, played by Darren Criss of A Very Potter Musical fame. Everyone at the school is excited. Why? Because the Warblers are about to throw an impromptu performance. A little bit different to how it is at McKinley, then. Running to the performance, "which kind of shuts the school down," Blaine grabs Kurt's hand, in a tender moment. As the club give their rendition of Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream" Kurt watches everyone's enthusiasm for them and it's apparent that he would fit in there better than he does at McKinley.

Mike is telling Tina how picturing Bieste helps the boys to "cool off", or so Sam said. Eager to try out this advice, Tina suggests that the pair find a room. Unfortunately, just as Sam did, she makes the mistake of saying Bieste's name out loud and Mike, just like Quinn, looks equally disturbed. In the corridor Quinn confronts Sam over the issue. He asks to talk about it in private but Quinn, on Sue's advice, starts to argue more. As Bieste walks past and asks whats going on, Quinn says that they're having a "lovers' quarrel", which is all her fault. To make matters worse Mike walks past and tells her to "stay away" from his woman, leaving poor Bieste looking mystified.

"How many guys have done this?" Will asks Sam and Mike, as they awkwardly explain about their unusual cooling-off method. Will isn't happy and asks them how they think she would feel if she found out about it: "she's just like us, an outsider at this school," he says. He asks them to stop and to spread the word to the other Glee kids.

Kurt has been caught out for spying but instead of beating him up Blaine and his friends have invited him for coffee. They suspect that he may have another motive for going there. "Can I ask you something? Are you guys all gay?" Kurt asks. Turns out that it's just Blaine who is but they explain that the school has a zero-tolerance harassment policy, meaning that everyone is accepted for who they are. Kurt explains to Blaine the bullying that he suffers at McKinley, particularly from Dave, the Neanderthal football player. Blaine too faced the same issues and that's why he transferred to Dalton. He tries to encourage Kurt to face the prejudice head on and to not let himself be a victim.

The girls are planning their girls vs boys number in the choir room. Something's wrong though as Rachel isn't talking. She maintains that she's just trying to stick to the rules by doing the opposite of what she normally does. Just then Puck and Artie come in, leaving Rachel to break her silence by yelling, "Spy! Spy!" Turns out two have just come to ask Brittany and Santana out on a double date. "Tell you what, you two turn up at Breadsticks tomorrow night around seven and if we don't find hotter chicks to date tonight we might show up." So romantic. Artie's just in shock that Puck's rather drastic methods work.

In the staffroom Bieste confronts Will about what's really going on with the Glee kids. As the coach, if the students don't respect her, then she can't do her job properly. When she asks him to be straight with her it's clear that she isn't expecting the answer that he gives and that she's obviously hurt by it.

At Breadsticks Puck is bigging it up about his time in juvie and it seems the boys' double date is
going well. "I've been squeezing your leg for like the last hour and a half, are you not attracted to me?" asks Brittany. However, Artie continues to use Puck's hard-to-get routine and says he's been distracted by their waitress who is obviously into him. Things turn even more bad boy when Puck announces they're going to dine and dash. While the others leave, Artie slips some money inside the bill; unfortunately Puck catches him. He isn't happy and says if he doesn't want his help, then he's on his own, leaving him while he takes Brittany and Santana home.

At Glee the next day it's the girls' turn to perform. They rock out in biker style with their number, a mash-up of "Start Me Up" and "Living On A Prayer". The club loves it and it looks like the boys are going to have to step up their game. During the performance Kurt receives a text from Blaine and looks more than a bit happy about it. Becky ruins the mood, though, as she runs in with a note from Sue, telling Will to meet her in the auditorium. She's celebrating because, as she says, "we got Bieste fired" and her full budget is restored. After some evil laughing she admits that Bieste in fact quit but that it was all thanks to his Glee kids.

The next day Dave, once again, pushes Kurt into the lockers. Taking inspiration from Blaine's words he storms into the locker rooms and confronts him. As the two yell at each other, Kurt is left stunned as, instead of punching him, Dave kisses him. All he can do is stand there as Dave runs off without so much as a word.

"I genuinely hope you guys are happy as Coach Bieste has quit," Will tells Glee. It isn't at all what they wanted, especially the football guys, as for once they're actually winning. Will says they better put their heads together to think of a way to win her back. Rachel is confused as to what the club has done and looks appalled when Finn explains what he and the boys have all been doing. "Can I just say, this is what happens when people don't put out," adds Santana.

Figgins then enters and says he needs to see him and Puck in his office. Turns out the probation service thought that "hanging with a crip" was doing outreach with a local gang, rather than helping out Artie. Puck says that he has been doing community service; he even got Artie a date. Will tries to plead his case but the probation officer says the rules can't be bent and if he can't find a suitable position for community service by tomorrow then he'll have to return to juvie. Puck flips out and leave saying that none of them care about him, let alone want to help him.

Blaine has come to McKinley to try and help Kurt sort things out with Dave. Dave puts on his usual front and when Blaine tells him that he knows he kissEd Kurt, he feigns ignorance. Blaine tells him that it's a hard thing he needs to come to terms with but he's not alone. Dave once again gives his typical response by lashing out and walking away. "Well, he's not coming out any time soon", laughs Blaine. Kurt doesn't take it so light-heartedly though and admits that it's because, up until yesterday, he had never been kissed.

Bieste is in the locker room packing away her things when Will walks in. He tries to persuade her not to leave, telling her the Glee kids feel awful. She won't be persuaded, though, saying that she needs a life change and will find "her bliss" somewhere else. Bieste admits that she's hurt that the boys thought about her in that way. She knows that she can be a bit intimidating but deep down she's "just a girl" and sometimes she just wants to be reminded of it. Will encourages her to put herself back on the dating scene but she insists that there's no point. She blurts out that she's never even been kissed and asks what that says about her, at 40. "What that says to me is that you're a beautiful, amazing woman whose heart is just too big for most men to stand" says Will as comfort. He then leans in and gives her a tender kiss on the lips: "now you've been kissed." He asks her to come to the choir room the next day so the boys can apologise in person.

Artie is confronting Puck once again on why he skipped Geometry. He says he's leaving McKinley and Lima, now that his probation officer has deemed helping Artie as not appropriate community service. Artie asks him what's wrong with just picking up trash but Puck says, "It's ghetto, dude. I'm not a garbage man," and tells him that on no account is he going back to juvie. "I thought you loved it there?" Artie questions but it turns out that he lied and that it was actually "frickin' terrifying" and that he wasn't the badass he said he was. Artie offers for Puck to be his community service since he's already helped him and he likes hanging out with him, asking him to let him tutor him in geometry and encourages him to pick up the trash. The two come to this compromise with Artie saying he needs to have some better influences.

At Glee, Bieste is waiting for her apology from the boys: what she wasn't expecting, though, was her own song-and-dance number. "Just because you're all hard and tough on the outside," says Finn, "doesn't mean you're not soft in the inside." "Like a chocolate turtle," Sam adds. In her honour, suited and booted, they perform a mash-up of "Stop! In The Name Of Love" and "Free Your Mind" in her honour. After they've finished the boys all give her a hug; it looks like she's staying at McKinley after all.

11 o'clock number

Last week's Rocky Horror numbers had a lot to live up to but I enjoyed this week's offerings all the same. The songs within the mash-ups worked well together and we got to see a different side to the club, the girls rocking it out, while the boys were much more dapper. I really enjoyed Artie and Puck's duet of "One Love (People Get Ready)", their voices really blending well together. My favourite number of the night, though, was the Warblers' rendition of Katy Perry's "Teenage Dream", and Blaine certainly stole the show with his charismatic performance.

Quote of the week

Quinn: "I'm getting straight A's, dating the cutest guy at school..."
Sue: "Who would rather be dry-humping She-Hulk. Dear God - why did I say that? Now that's what I'm picturing. You know what kind of disgusting images I'm gonna have to look at to get this out of my head? I'm gonna have to go straight to the wound care centre. I'm gonna have to stare at some wounds."

Overall

Tonight's episode put Kurt very much back in our focus. We were introduced to the very dreamy Blaine from Dalton Academy, who seems very likely to be a possible love interest for him, who is most definitely a vocal match for Kurt. We were also left wondering what is going to happen with Dave, now that he has kissEd Kurt but seems to be very much in the closet. I really enjoyed the development of Bieste's character, showing that underneath her tough exterior she just wants to be loved like everybody else. Elsewhere the relationships within the club are going from strength to strength with Sam and Quinn and Brittany and Artie heating up.

 

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