REVIEW: Guest Reviewer Hamavand Engineer Shares His Thoughts On HOLDING THE MAN

Thursday 14 March 2024 7:30, Belvoir St Theatre

Playing at Belvoir St Theatre, HOLDING THE MAN captured audiences from nearby neighbourhoods, and afar, for it’s a queer story told by queer people. Touted as Australia’s favourite queer love story, it is brought back to life in a production that can only be labelled as sensational. The achingly sad story of the 15 year-long love affair between Timothy Conigrave and the boy he fell in love with at high school, John Caleo. The two met as teens in the 70s at Xavier College, a Jesuit school in Melbourne, and dated for the rest of their lives — which were tragically cut short by the AIDS epidemic in Australia.

A portion of the theatre was decked with 70’s style sofas to the right of the floor area, bean bags scattered around the floor, plastic chairs, and the ubiquitous mirror ball (yes there was more than one of course) that hung above the audience, offering a glimpse of the nostalgia that would reveal itself later. This is all thanks to set designer, Stephen Curtis, who authentically set the scene for the love story that was written as a memoir by the late Tim Conigrave first and foremost, and then adapted into a play that first showed at the at Sydney’s Stables Theatre in 2006 and has been a hit ever since. Directed by Belvoir Artistic Director Eamon Flack, this staging creates a powerful sense of community connectedness to the story and its characters.

Tom Conroy plays the role of Tim, who is the experience-hungry, exuberant but not always admired. Danny Ball displays the softness in the quieter John, who is sporty, athletic and becomes the apple of Tim’s eye and wouldn’t think of coming out to his migrant father. A supporting cast of four (including Rebecca Massey, Russell Dykstra, Shannen Alyce Quan, and Guy Simon) juggle a host of humorous supporting characters. Their performances are deeply endearing and at times, appear as if they are stealing the show, however, Conroy and Ball perfectly and confidently carry the weight of this intensely tragic love story all the way to the end.

As the love story between Tim and John unfolds on stage, I couldn’t help being transported back in time to when I was growing and the emotions I felt when I was going through a similar experience. I looked around the audience regularly to gauge their resonance and couldn’t help but feel many of them felt the same. Most were perhaps once part of a society that condemned anyone with HIV and when AIDS was a death threat and anyone with it, was to be outcast. The sadness took over the audience on several occasions as the story went on to reveal the challenges Tim and John faced growing up in the 70’s without society’s acceptance, but also, the way in which they managed their lives with their families and friends. Their first kiss between Ball and Conroy was not so impactful but what was endearing and certainly nostalgic, was their first conversation over the landline in which they confessed their liking for each other and didn’t want to get off their phone. It reminded me of what it felt like to speak for over 2 hours with the one you love and not want to hang up. Ahh the days of love gone by!

The irony of it all is that that the production is filled with as much laughter and horniness as it is sadness. The story starts off in the 1960’s, backstage during a Wizard of Oz show at a local shopping centre, where we are instantly transported to camp city, with Dorothy’s ruby glittered shoes. It wasn’t long into the show that nudity presented itself when Ball dropped his pants and the audience gasped with hopes of wanting more naughty than nice. When transposing the story from page to stage, Playwright Tommy Murphy jettisons some of the horniness but dials up the comedy, which Flack and his cast take full advantage of. A scene involving a teenaged circle jerk at a slumber party was one of several that had the audience in hysterics. The overly nasty jokes were funny and

appealing and provided a balance to a story so rich in love and tragedy. Romantic moments between Ball and Conroy were perfectly orchestrated, with divine acting credits to both for the passion with which they embraced one another in secrecy.

The fairytale story of two soulmates who find each other and then die together, 15 years later, as the result of the HIV virus had audiences in tears. The audience is barely given time to process a powerful second-act moment in which Tim and John grapple with their freshly delivered HIV diagnosis as if it were a death sentence; each moment more touching than the last, as the audience felt the pain and suffering that was endured by those affected by HIV/AIDS at the time. Whilst the love was never lost between them, the hardships faced through it was deeply touching and had the audience weeping quietly in their seats, until the very final scene, where all went still and the reflective audience went into silence. I cannot fault the performances in any way whatsoever. In fact, it is no surprise that Conigrave’s memoir, published in 1995, holds a special spot within the gay Australian psyche and still remains as one of the most emotionally potent portrayals of living and dying through the AIDS crisis in this country. Whilst the memory element is softer now that AIDS is no longer the death sentence of the 90s, nor is it the effective alienation of family and community. The truth and the honesty of both Tim and John’s family responses, affect a world where the heart is in the relationships and one particular relationship.

Flack has a flair for the playful and the first half of Holding the Man is a comic joy – funny, sexually frank and is brilliantly performed. It was however, the second half of the show clearly resonates with audiences and speaks to stories of so many men and women with HIV and the struggle they go through to find their place in the world.

What is interesting about this production, is that the story is told after 30 years of the social understanding, fear, terror, and compassion of that time. However, the emotions resonate much the same as they perhaps did all that time ago. I cannot fault this production and vehemently recommend it to anybody and everybody. A must see for an education on life, love, tragedy and who want to experience the joys of simplicity and decadence of love.

 

Production images by Brett BOARDMAN

 

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