Edlow details how her separation and subsequent divorce has given her a new perspective on her 13-year marriage or "light hostage situation".
Fielding Edlow; creator of award-winning, dark comedy web series, Bitter Homes and Gardens is bringing her brand-new comedy show to the Edinburgh Festival Fringe 2023. Here she details how her separation and subsequent divorce has given her a new perspective on her 13-year marriage or "light hostage situation" in 'Gaslighting Is My Love Language'.
Bitter Homes and Gardens starring Fielding and her (then) husband Larry Clarke (who you might recognise from Twin Peaks or Contagion Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D) had simple concept - a fictionalised version of real-life where the couple would lay their exceptionally fractious relationship bare.
But it was in the making of their most successful project to date; as the couple watched these fictionalised versions of themselves warring on screen, that they were forced to admit how real their truly unfiltered on-screen dynamic was. And so, after two series, the L.A. couple had to admit they were in a deeply unhealthy situation. They definitely cared about each other, but their real-life interactions had become not just ill-tempered, but toxic...
In Gaslighting is My Love Language, Fielding uses dark humour and a sharp tongue to unpick how she and her husband started gaslighting each other from the moment they met in 2006. Each falling into a deeply unhealthy state of what could essentially be coined as "co-dependent Gaslighting"
Larry would often tell his wife, "No man could spend more than an afternoon with you", and whilst in her rational mind Fielding knew this wasn't true, hearing it repeatedly left her feeling oddly grateful that Larry was heroic enough to be married to her. But this manipulation and psychological control was by no means one-sided; in a tale reminiscent of Roald Dahl's The Twits, Fielding exacted her revenge by deliberately shrinking all of Larry's hoodies and shorts in the dryer to make him think he had gained weight... It worked.
Fielding says, "We were two desperately aspiring, narcissistic, broken people...we'd say things aloud that most of us would consider a "deal breaker" but we were just getting started."
HE questioned her critically acclaimed writing, making her feel that she was just a scatter-brained snack vlogger.
SHE poured doubt on his storytelling until a once confident yarn-spinner was stumbling over dinner party conversation.
HE withheld sex and told her she was too tired until she believed him.
SHE asked, "Hey Larry, why were you the only actor in Contagion who was not asked to do a pandemic PSA on handwashing?" causing him to panic his career was over.
Neither was the other's emergency contact.
Now, Fielding and Larry live separately, can stand each other again (in small doses), and are developing Bitter Homes and Gardens Season Three. And yes, they'll be divorced on the show as well as in real life.
Fielding Edlow: Gaslighting Is My Love Language will be performed at 7.10pm in Just the Tonic at the Grassmarket (The Meeting Room) from 3rd - 13th August
Booking link: https://edinburgh.justthetonic.com/event/88:3283/
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