Review: 'Boyz' Keep the Faith

God put the rhythm in them and now they're his mega-energized miracle workers! There's really nothing else to it.  With five sexy, stunning, and spiritual guys celebrating their holy savior through funk and rhyme, 90 minutes of bible-thumping has never been more fun!

The invigorating cast of Altar Boyz has pulled over the van for their "last performance of their Raise the Praise Tour 2007."  This new musical spoof on Christian boy bands won the 2005 Outer Critic Circle Award for Best Off-Broadway Musical and is in San Francisco for four weeks to "soothe each one of your souls with the glory of pop music."

Over-stuffed with bombastic choreography, hilarious songwriting, witty one-liners, and wholesome Jesus-loving, Altar Boyz is just a genuine good time. 

You would think the church jokes would be old-hat mid-show…but they don't! The brilliant book penned by Kevin Del Aguila keeps things rolling with a simple plot-line surrounding The Genesis of the Altar Boyz and the new Soul Sensor DX-12.  Between heart-pounding melodies, the boys count the number of cleansed souls in the audience with a mysterious high-tech machine from "the good people at Sony Records."  Things get sticky when a stubborn 10 or less troubled souls get caught in the balance.

Over-brimming with catchy pop numbers like "Church Rulez" and "Rhythm in Me," Altar Boyz features a heaven-sent four-piece band with music and lyrics by Michael Patrick Walker and Gary Adler (who plays keyboards in the San Francisco engagement).  Adler and Walker excellently mix-it-up with a Latin-beat in "La Vida Eternal," a gospel-style "Body Mind & Soul," beat-boxing with "The Miracle Song," and even a tribute The Exorcist's tubular bells.

After their insanely killer opening number, Matthew requests to "get this party started!" All five bow their heads and clasp hands in prayer.  Each guy has a distinct and likable personality – terrific solo and in group numbers.

Matthew, the band leader played by Matthew Buckner, an angelic yet raspy-voice crooner, plays to his hunky heart-throb advantage when wooing a lucky girl from the house with lyrics: "Girl, you make me wanna wait!"

Ryan J. Ratliff unquestionably steals the show as the flamboyant gay… er… Catholic tenor, Mark.  His voice is incredible (almighty high-notes) with impeccable comic-timing.  Ratliff especially brings down the house with an entertaining coming-out song, "Epiphany," nailing it with a pitch-perfect Jennifer Holliday power-belt.

Jay Garcia and Ryan Strand play the token Latin and Jewish boys, respectively.  Garcia tends to be up-staged by the other guys until his fate is changed with a confidential letter and flan cake.  Strand also has a fantastic voice, showcased during "I Believe and "Everybody Fits" (opposite four Lampchops puppets).  Jesse JP Johnson rounds-out the cast as the dim-witted and lovable Luke, recovering from his bout with "exhaustion."

Between an uber-smart libretto, phenomenal choreography by Christoper Gattelli, a fancy light-show by Natasha Katz, and non-stop smiles and cheers after every song – this brotherhood helps to keep the faith… in musical theatre.

Altar Boyz: music & lyrics by Gary Adler & Michael Patrick Walker, book by Kevin Del Aguila, directed by Stafford Arima at the Orpheum Theatre through April 8. 90 minutes with no intermission. Tickets ($25-$80) are available at 415-512-7770 or www.shnsf.com.  Photos by Carol Rosegg.

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