David Templeton's TWISTED CHRISTMAS LIVE 7 Plays The Glaser Center 12/5

David Templeton's Twisted Christmas Live 7 plays Saturday, December 5, 7:30 p.m., Featuring Will Durst, Steve Jaxon, Michele Anna Jordan, Debi Durst, Lynn Ruth Miller, Tim Kniffin, Renee De La Prade, and Frances Lee McCain

In a dangerous world full of chaos and uncertainty, it's good to know that there are some things we can still count on. Twisted Christmas Live is one of those things, returning again for its seventh unpredictable year. The annual lit-comedy-variety show will once again feature a collection of classic and original short stories, read aloud on stage (the old-fashioned way, only different) by an eclectic assortment of Bay Area performers: Political satirist Will Durst will read the modern classic ‘Crumbs at Midnight,' about a plateful of cookies attempting to survive Christmas Eve once a very-hungry Santa arrives down the chimney; cult favorite Frances Lee McCain, who played the monster-battling mom in the classic twisted Christmas film ‘Gremlins,' will perform ‘The Snow Men,' a Twilight Zone homage in which an indecisive artist must battle an ever-growing army of snow men; award-winning food writer and cookbook author Michele Anna Jordan will read Garrison Keillor's hilarious ‘7 Principles of a Successful Christmas,' a delightfully off-kilter "how to" piece in which the author suggests staging dramatic episodes on Christmas Day, "just to keep everyone awake"; Steve Jaxon, host of KSRO's popular The Drive radio show, will bring Ken Kesey's lyrically weird ‘Skid Row Santa' to life; octogenarian critic-stripper-performance artist Lynn Ruth Miller will perform her own ‘An Old-Fashioned Christmas,' in which an unstoppable elderly neighbor wreaks havoc in her quest to provide the local children with a memorable holiday; award-winning stage actor Tim Kniffin will read LOra Lee's warped ‘Mr. Spock's First Christmas,' a stardate-by-stardate chronicle of the logical alien's first baffling holiday aboard the Enterprise. Hosted by North Bay journalist and performer David Templeton, the show will also feature a musical tribute to the Christmas songs of Weird Al Yankovic, by Culann's Hounds' accordionist (and The Accordion Babes Calendar creator) Renee De La Prade.

The show takes place one night only on Saturday, December 5 at 7:30 p.m., at The Glaser Center, 547 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa. Tickets are $20 in advance, $25 at the door, available on-line at www.brownpapertickets.com, and at Copperfields Book Stores, The Last Record Store, and Back Door Disc.