Review: LOOPED Brings Legendary Diva Tallulah Bankhead to Electric Life at Garden Theatre

Legend has it that she smoked 120 cigarettes a day. Her love affairs were harder to count. Tallulah Bankhead was an icon of Hollywood's Golden Age, but she died a legend as much for her wild lifestyle and colorful language as for anything she did on screen. But you don't need to know anything about her - and I've already told you as much as I knew - to eat up every laugh-out-loud witticism in LOOPED, an inside look at the making of her final film, now on stage at The Garden Theatre.

Actually, LOOPED is more specific than that. The movie in question is Die! Die! My Darling!, and by the time Act I opens, filming has already wrapped. We meet Ms. Bankhead as she barges into a post-production editing room with an F word so boisterous and stylish it could only leap from the lips of a diva. Film editor Danny Miller needs her to dub over a single line of garbled audio. He hopes to wrap that up in mere minutes. Tallulah's Scotch-drenched dramatics have other plans. The play proceeds in pursuit of that single successfully uttered sentence over two acts.

You might anticipate that so small a premise would quickly yield diminishing returns. I confess, I entered the theatre unexcited by the brief synopsis I had read, certain that this true-life anecdote would be better suited for trivia books than for two hours on stage.

My expectations hadn't allowed for playwright Matthew Lombardo's ceaselessly clever ribaldry, nor for Kelly Wells's pitch-perfect prima donna as the larger-than-life Tallulah. She doesn't try to mimic the star but does adopt just enough of a Transatlantic accent to invoke old Hollywood glamor, wholly imbued by the spirit of divadom. Her comic timing is spot on, and plenty of her line readings are delicious.

Like everyone else in the room, I laughed out loud a lot. But when LOOPED moves into its second act, more serious matters take the stage as Miller's frustration with Bankhead's superstar antics reach a boiling point. David Atwood skillfully grows his character from earnest everyman to tortured soul, taking the audience along for the ride. Reviews faulted Broadway's Valerie Harper-fronted production for an abrupt tonal shift between the two acts, but the Garden mostly manages to overcome that challenge, a credit to the performers on stage (of which there are three - Kahlid Elijah Tapia rounds out the cast as audio engineer Steve in a role both supportive and amusing).

Two main characters dialoguing in the same room for two hours can mean the performers keep moving around stage to create visual interest, sometimes in ways that don't feel entirely natural. Then again, I wouldn't mind wandering Tramaine Berryhill's two-story set design myself, dressed as it is in snazzy Midcentury Modern decor.

Laced with expletives and racy exchanges, LOOPED is one film history lesson you won't want to share with the kids. But true to its title, this pleasant surprise of a dram-com is one I'd already like to see again.

How To Get Tickets

LOOPED runs at the Garden through October 24, 2021. Performers wear transparent mouth guards, audience members must remain fully face-masked at all times, and an array of other Covid precuations are in effect. Tickets are available the Garden box office in downtown Winter Garden, FL or at www.gardentheatre.org.

Photos by Steven Miller Photography, courtesy of Garden Theatre

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