'Legally Blonde:' Wasted Energy in a Can

Legally Blonde

Music and lyrics by Laurence O'Keefe and Nell Benjamin; book by Heather Hach; based upon the novel by Amanda Brown and the MGM motion picture; directed and choreographed by Jerry Mitchell; scenic design by David Rockwell; costume design by Gregg Barnes; lighting design by Ken Posner and Paul Miller; sound design by Acme Sound Partners; hair design, David BrIan Brown; orchestrations by Christopher Jahnke; arrangements by Laurence O'Keefe and James Sampliner; music director/conductor, Jan Rosenberg; animal trainer, Bill Berloni

Cast:

Elle Woods, Becky Gulsvig; Warner Huntington III, Jeff McLean; Vivienne Kensington, Megan Lewis; Emmett Forrest, D.B. Bonds; Professor Callahan, Ken Land; Paulette, Natalie Joy Johnson; Serena, Cortney Wolfson; Margot, Rhiannon Hansen; Pilar, Crystal Joy; Brooke Wyndham, Coleen Sexton; Kate/Chutney, Alex Ellis; District Attorney, Sarah Marie Jenkins; Stenographer, Lauren Ashley Zakrin; Enid, Gretchen Burghart; Courtney/Mom/Whitney, Stacey Sargeant; Grandmaster Chad/Dewey/Kyle, Mamie Parris; Dad/Winthrop/Reporter, Paul Jackel; Pforzheimer, Nick Dalton; Lowell, Joshua James Campbell; Carlos, Josh Walden; Padamandan/Nikos, Adam Zelasko; Aaron, Tally Sessions; Bruiser, Frankie; Rufus, China

Performances: Now through December 14, The Bushnell Center for the Performing Arts, 166 Capitol Avenue, Hartford, CT

Box Office: 860-987-5900 or www.bushnell.org, $25-$75

Legally Blonde: The Musical (on tour and on stage at The Bushnell in Hartford, Connecticut through December 14) wants so desperately to be loved that it looks and sounds an awful lot like an obnoxious, attention-seeking two-year-old. With its incessant "look at me, look at me" arm waving and endless jumping up and down, this adolescent adaptation of the charming 2001 Reese Witherspoon movie is a crass, superficial commercialization of a story that originally had lots of heart.

As in the movie, the musical follows Malibu debutante Elle Woods on her journey from Delta Nu sorority babe to distinguished Harvard Law School graduate. Dumped by her college sweetheart Warner Huntington III for not being "serious" enough to climb the corporate and political ladder with him, Elle doggedly follows him to the ivy-covered halls in Cambridge, Massachusetts and along the way discovers the legal brains and courtroom talents that have been hiding beneath her totally blonde exterior all along. So what began as a simple ploy to win back her totally handsome and totally self-absorbed boyfriend becomes a journey of self-discovery and the realization of true worth. Along with juris prudence, Elle learns that real love begins with self-esteem.

That simple message is all but lost in the noise and hyperactivity of Legally Blonde: The Musical. From the painfully repetitious opening number "Omigod You Guys" to the even more repetitious - and woefully inept - high school cheerleading moves that try to pass as choreography, this two-hour-long product placement for Red Bull is an ill-conceived pre-teen cartoon. Even the similarly commercial High School Musical geared toward the same audience has more smarts, integrity and heart than this perpetually perky pastiche.

Composers Laurence O'Keefe and Nell Benjamin have taken tiny, touching moments from the film and turned them into sledgehammer production numbers. "Bend and Snap," for example, transforms the cute girl power bonding that develops between Elle and her equally put upon friend Paulette into a crass and almost trashy degradation of the way in which women attract men. Natalie Joy Johnson as the hapless Paulette, a blue collar hairdresser working in the midst of a blue-blooded world, does her best to bring shy, awkward dignity to the piece, but there is just too much pop video vulgarity for her to overcome. Similarly, Elle's Harvard admissions interview becomes a marching band extravaganza complete with drum majors, sequins, cheerleaders and a baton. The word "silly" is too kind for this and several other musical numbers that seem to believe that high-octane hyperkinetics is a suitable distraction from trite lyrics and a simplistic score. Energy isn't a bad thing, but the degree to which Legally Blonde relies on noise over substance is downright criminal.

When the show finally quiets down a bit in the second act and focuses on the mutual respect that Elle and rumpled teaching assistant Emmett share, glimpses of sincerity appear. "Take It Like a Man" in which roles reverse and the lawyer gets the makeover is a genuinely affectionate duet that reveals a growing attraction between student and mentor. Becky Gulsvig as Elle and D.B. Bonds as Emmett shine here. Unfortunately this tenderness comes very late in the proceedings. In their earlier duet, a disengaging "Chip on My Shoulder," Bonds sounded flat and off key, and the intrusion of the all-giddy all-girl Greek Chorus (who didn't think we'd get the joke without actually telling us what they were!) killed any potential for intimacy.

The high-speed locomotive that is Legally Blonde frustrates no end, especially since this national touring company is about as hard-working and talented as you could want. Jeff McLean as the preening lothario Warner has oozing charisma and a smooth, crooning tenor, while Megan Lewis as his buttoned up Brahmin spews effective vitriol. Coleen Sexton, a former Elphaba on the national tour of Wicked, is a fit and funny Brooke Wyndham, the accused husband killer whom Elle defends. Her big Act II opener "Whipped Into Shape," an athletic workout number in which she leads a unified chorus in precision jump rope maneuvers, is the one choreographic highlight of the evening.

As our heroine Elle, Gulsvig has loads of sparkle and a sweet, endearing charm. She has great stage presence and a strong pop voice that makes her anthem "So Much Better" so much better than it actually is. My only wish is that she and every other young blonde musical actress traipsing the boards these days didn't look and sound like Kristin Chenoweth. You'd swear they were manufacturing Galinda clones in an effort to make every show as pop-u-lar as Wicked.

With a scaled down set and an orchestra as thin as the synthesized sound it creates (two keyboards, a drummer and a "music copier" are all that's listed in the program), the touring production of Legally Blonde: The Musical is pretty lean. But if the enthusiastic standing ovation given by the mid-week sold-out house in Hartford is any indication, bare bones is apparently good enough when packaged in shocking pink.

PHOTOS BY Joan Marcus: Becky Gulsvig as Elle and company; Becky Gulsvig as Elle Woods; Becky Gulsvig and the Greek Chorus of Delta Nu