BWW Reviews: The 2,000-Year-Old Man Kvells Over Alison Nusbaum's Homage to Mel Brooks' Ladies, Films and Songs at Don't Tell Mama

BroadwayWorld.com: Ladies and gentlemen, we are here outside Don’t Tell Mama on Manhattan’s Restaurant Row after the final performance of Alison Nusbaum’s debut cabaret show, LADIES: A Raucous Homage to Mel Brooks’ Broads, directed by Jay Rogers with Ricky Ritzel as musical director. Let’s get some audience reaction. Sir, excuse me, you seem to have enjoyed the show.

2,000 Year-Old Man: What’s not to like about a shikse with a Jewish last name? She was a big hit.

BroadwayWorld.com: Are you a long-time cabaret fan?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Ah, I’ve actually been attending cabaret shows for almost 2,000 years.

BroadwayWorld.com: Wait a minute, do you mean to say that you’re 2,000 years old?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Yes, give or take a couple of hundred.

BroadwayWorld.com: That’s unbelievable. So did you see a lot of 19th century French cabaret at the Moulin Rouge and German cabaret in the 1920s?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Not only that, but for a while I was an MC at a German cabaret club called "The Kibbitz Room." You know the character Joel Grey played in that Liza Minnelli show? That was me! Very few people know this, but cabaret really goes back to Ancient Rome.

BroadwayWorld: Ancient Rome?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Of course, that meshugenah Emperor Caligula was really into cabaret. After a hard day crucifying Christians, he would have intimate parties in a room in the palace called “Don’t Tell Caesar.” He could sing everything in the Great Roman Songbook. He was nutsy fagan, but what a performer!

BroadwayWorld.com: So, what brought you to Alison Nusbaum’s show?

2,000 Year-Old Man: I saw her practically steal this year’s MAC Awards and when I heard she was doing songs connected to movies by my old pal Mel Brooks, I had to be here.

BroadwayWorld.com: Wait, you attended the MAC Awards?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Of course. You know when they gave the songwriter Ervin Drake that Lifetime Achievement Award? That was really me singing “A Very Good Year.” Ervin and I look very much alike so I stood in for him, but we didn’t tell anyone. I wish they would have let me get to the verse about it being a very good year when I was 1,025.

BroadwayWorld.com: Alison won the MAC Award for “Best Piano Bar/Restaurant Singing Entertainer,” but what impressed you about her MAC event performance?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Are you kidding? Remember when she sang “Don’t Cry for Me Argentina” from Evita, and did that bit when she raises her arms like Eva Peron—I had an affair with Eva by the way, what a broad!—and Alison's underarm flab is flapping like a pelican waddle? Lemme tell ya, that was chutzpah! Funniest thing I’ve seen since the campfire scene in Blazing Saddles.

BroadwayWorld.com: Speaking of that film, you say you’re friends with Mel Brooks?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Of course, who do you think gave him gave him that cockamamie idea for The Producers? And that “Springtime for Hitler” song? I got that from German cabaret.

BroadwayWorld.com: So what did you like so much about Alison’s show?

2,000 Year-Old Man: She comes out in this psychedelic 1960s schmatta pant suit and then rips it off to reveal this sexy silver gown that’s sleeveless so you see that farkakte underarm flab. I almost up-chucked my nectarines . . . half a peach, half a plum, it’s a helluva fruit. Anyway, then she opens singing “Sweet Georgia Brown" from To Be, or Not to Be in Polish and holds up cue cards for the audience with the lyrics also in Polish. That was so Mel Brooks. He would have kvelled if he saw that bit. (Click on Page 2 below to continue)

BroadwayWorld.com: Did you know that Alison’s been working at Don’t Tell Mama for more than four years?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Of course, that’s why she said she was getting a discount on the room fee. What a funny girl. And she also has a terrific voice with a nice Borscht Belt. That’s a little Jewish humor to break up the levity. Get it?

BroadwayWorld.com: Got it. Anything else in the show stand out for you?

2,000 Year-Old Man: I’ll tell you, I really got a kick out of it when Alison sang “I Get a Kick Out of You,” which Mel used in Blazing Saddles, and then that Ricky Bitzel . . . Ritzel, whatever his name is . . . cut in with “Doo Dah, Doo Dah” from “Camptown Races.” Then after she starts singing “Sweet Mystery of Life,” that old Victor Herbert song that was in Young Frankenstein, Ritzel interrupts her with “Glory, Glory, Hallelujah” and Alison starts sexing it up and swaying side to side. Oy, she got me so excited. Then she does that schmaltzy, tongue-in-cheek hippie song “Love Power” from The Producers and gets all farklempt at the end, and Ritzel tries cheering her up with that Irving Berlin song from Young Frankenstein —God, how I miss my friend Irving—and Alison wails “Putting on the Ritz” like Peter Boyle did in the movie. That was so funny, I was plotzing.

BroadwayWorld.com: Sounds like a terrific show. Any other highlights?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Well, Alison does a costume change and comes out in this black and red corset for “I’m Tired” like she's Lilly Von Schtupp (photo) from Blazing Saddles. Then she awkwardly climbs on top of the piano and sings while on her back with her head hanging off the edge of the piano. It was sexy and hilarious at the same time. It was like she was Carol Burnett doing Madeline Kahn doing Marlene Dietrich, with the class of Anne Bancroft and ditziness of Teri Garr; the whole mishpucha of Mel Brooks’s ladies. You don’t need Sighagra when you watch a routine like that.

BroadwayWorld.com: Don’t you mean Viagra?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Bubbelah, back in my day they called it SIGHagra because if it didn’t work you’d sigh all day long. Feh.

BroadwayWorld.com: We hear some of the Don’t Tell Mama staff got into the act?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Oh my God, they did some great shtick when Alison sang “The Inquisition” from History of the World. By the way, I was in Spain in the 1400s and Torquemada thought I was so funny he let me entertain the other Jews in the dungeons. Anyway, there’s the part in the song where two persecuted Jews sing about being imprisoned and they throw a spotlight to the back of the room and there’s Mama’s maven Sidney Myer and his sidekick Randy Lester wearing beards and yarmulkes. You haven’t lived until you’ve heard Sidney Myer sing a lyric that includes Preparation H.

BroadwayWorld.com: So I take it you would recommend Alison’s show if she performs it again?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Recommend it? You shmendrik, I’m gonna review it and give it a rave! In fact, I’ll make a prediction: May the God of Abraham strike me down if this girl isn’t nominated next year for one of those MAC Award tchatckes.

BroadwayWorld.com: You also review cabaret shows?

2,000 Year-Old Man: Of course, my first job was for AppianWay.com so I know from what I’m talking. Shalom.

Note: For samples of the famous Mel Brooks-Carl Reiner 2,000-Year-Old Man routines, check You Tube.

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