Below, check out highlights from SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE's Weekend Update with Colin Jost and Michael Che from THE MARCH 28th broadcast:
"WEEKEND UPDATE" ANCHOR COLIN JOST - "The Governor of Indiana has signed a new law allowing businesses to turn away gay and lesbian customers saying it's part of their 'religious freedom.' You'll be able to tell which stories are supporting the new law because they'll have these helpful little signs."
JOST - "The head of the House committee investigated the Benghazi attacks said Friday that
Hillary Clinton wiped her personal email server 'clean,' permanently deleting all her emails. So at least one Clinton has learned how to wipe something clean."
"WEEKEND UPDATE" ANCHOR MICHAEL CHE - "A new Justice Department report claims that the American DEA agents in Colombia participated in sex parties with prostitutes hired by drug cartels. In response to this incredible irresponsible behavior the agents have been promoted to secret service."
CHE - "During Senator Ted Cruz's speech announcing his run for President, he repeatedly asked voters to imagine what the country would look like with him as its leader. And then he repeatedly asked voters to stop laughing."
CHE - "Senator
Harry Reid said Friday that he came to his decision to not run for re-election while he was recovering from an exercising accident. That's right! An exercising accident and definitely not roughed up by senate bad-ass Mitch McConnell."
CHE - "George Zimmerman, who shot Trayvon Martin, spoke out for the first time saying he blames
President Obama for inciting racial tension that erupted after the shooting. At least he thinks it was Obama, it was pretty dark at the time."
JOST - "According to a recent memo, American Apparel wants to stop using what they call "Instagram hoes" for their ads and instead hire professional models. But good news, they're still going to make them up to like they've been kidnapped by human traffickers. Because when I see ads for American Apparel, I don't wanna buy clothes, I wanna see those women rescued by
Liam Neeson.
JOST - "Officials in England reburied remains of King Richard III after his bones were discovered underneath a parking lot three years ago. So this time, everybody remember: He's buried in C-8."
CHE - "A candy store in Los Angeles has created a 440 pound peanut butter cup. It's called, Cee Lo."
JOST - "A new study shows that a forty-five minute nap in the middle of the day can enhance a person's memories. Memories like, 'oh right, I'm an alcoholic.'"
JOST - "Louisiana police arrested a man for shooting his eighteen-year-old son during an argument over orange juice. It's the second-worst crime that OJ is responsible for."
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