BWW Recap: THE LEAGUE Gets 'Epi-Sexy' In This Week's Episode

This week on THE LEAGUE, Pete has great "epi-sex," and Jenny has to cook Chow Mein for Ellie's school. Also, Andre gets glasses even though he has never needed them before. A lot of craziness ensues, so read on to find out everything that happens on "Epi-Sexy," but beware of SPOILERS!

Pete is seeing a girl who has a mild case of epilepsy, and she has a seizure while having sex with him. She tells them that they have to be careful to make sure it doesn't happen again, but Pete tells the guys later that it was the best sex he ever had, since she's "epi-sexy," as Kevin puts it.

Andre shows up to the bar wearing glasses because he needs them now, since he's a doctor he'd know. All the guys call BS, but Andre sticks to the fact that he needs the glasses becasue he can't see without them.

Andre invites himself over to the MacArthur's for dinner. Kevin gets annoyed with Andre and takes the glasses off of him. On his way to the bathroom, Andre sees Kevin's scout team, but when Kevin catches him snooping on his computer, Andre plays the "he's blind" card, since Kevin took his glasses. Kevin tells Andre that everything better be above board, since they are versing each other this week, and since Andre has already cheated once before this year, he better be careful.

Ellie is having a sleepover with Allison, and Jenny feeds the kids her "famous Chow Mein." In actuality, it is just take-out, but Jenny has been telling Ellie she made it since she was a little kid, and feels bad telling her the truth after all of these years.

At Pete's place, he is using static on the TV, and really loud music to trigger a seizure from the girl he's seeing, but it doesn't work. They end up having sex, but he tells the guys it wasn't the "epi-sex" that he wanted. At the bar, Kevin tells Taco and Pete that he caught Andre looking at his scout team, and now he's puling a guilt con on him, so that they should play up the honesty thing to make Andre feel bad for stealing on of the players from Kevin's scout list.

Rafi shows up to the bar, and tells them his self-defense course for women has exploded in popularity. He tells them that he's also going to start teaching a self-defense self-defense class, where he teaches men how to combat the tactics he's teaching in his women's self-defense class. Rafi tells the guys his tactic is using "bullet time," from The Matrix, and uses Pete to demonstrate it. He throws Pete to the ground and puts him in a hold, until Kevin tells him to stop. Rafi's attack made everything fall out of Pete's pockets, too. Rafi also tells them about his other method, "self-defeces," a last resore tactic. While explaining how to do it, Rafi ends up pooping his pants.

Jenny is at Ellie's school, and Ellie's teacher tells her that next week is Ellie's turn to bring in a family recipe to share with the class. Ellie tells Jenny she should make the Chow Mein. Allison's mom Cheryl talks to Jenny and tells her that Allison came home smelling of marijuana, but Jenny says it wasn' them. (At this moment though, I can almost count on it being Taco's fault.)

Andre proposes to kevin that this week they set each others line-up, as a display of trust. Andre makes Kevin's line-up, and Kevin locks it in. When it's Kevin's turn, he takes Andre's glasses of "because of glare," and then makes sure Andre tells him that he trusts him before purposefully screwing up Andre's line-up to make a point.

Taco left his guest stash in Jenny's dryer, which prompts her to realize why Allison's clothes smelled like marijuana. Jenny tells Taco about her predicament with the Chow Mein, and Taco tells her that he eskimo step-brother has a great recipe for it, and he can help her out.

Andre lets Jenny use his restaurant to cook with Lee Wei Lee, Taco's chef friend. However, instead of just cooking the chow-mein Lee Wei Lee puts noodles on his head and dough on his face, prompting Jenny to ask Taco if he is "fritatta." Taco gets angry at Jenny, and he and Lee Wei Lee leave.

Out of nowhere Rafi comes in to bring Andre a toilet for his kitchen. He asks them if that was Lee Wei Lee who left, and tells them that Lee is dating his ex, Gail "the human garbage can."

Kevin kills Andre 96-43 this week, Rafi shows Andre his BDE (Broken Dick Emergency) and Andre wasn't wearing his glasses, but still claimed to see it, making them have proof he was faking needing glasses. Andre tells them "the gig is up," but none of them were actually fooled by Andre in the first place, I mean who would be.

Rafi's speed got switched with Pete's Alltoids when Rafi attacked him earlier, so while Pete is having sex with the girl, he keeps taking the speed, not realizing they aren't mints. This causes Pete to have a seizure while they are having sex.

Taco cant find his weed, and he tells Kevin that he hid it in the chinese spices and now its gone. At the school, Jenny feeds everyone the Chow Mein, but because she used the weed accidentally, she gets all the kids and the teacher high.

Rafi runs into Gail and Lee Wei Lee. Rafi tries to win Gail back, which ends up with him and Lee in a fight. Rafi is about to win when Lee uses "self-defeces" on Rafi.

Leave it to Pete to get turned on by a girl having a seizure while he's having sex with her. But, since the same thing happened to her when Pete had the seizure, I guess he got what was coming to him. Still not as annoying as Andre pretending to need glasses all episode, and being, well being Andre when it comes to what he can and can't "see." Andre gets what he deserves and loses the match-up, though, so justice is served. I always wonder what prompts him to do such dumb things, I mean who fakes needing glasses just for the heck of it? I swear the more Andre tries to be cool the less cool he is.

Man, Jenny can be just an awful parent sometimes. From faking Breast Cancer to get out of a bake sale, to feeding children marijuana laced Chow Mein, she definitely isn't getting a Parent of the Year award anytime soon. Better marijuana than the speed, though, so there is a plus side to it.

No Ruxin again this week, which is always sad. However, the did make up for it with a lot of hilarious Rafi moments. From calling Keanu Reeves, "the guy from The Lakehouse," to accidentally pooping his pants, there is a never a dull moment with Rafi. Also, there is nothing like watching him get into a fight with a "fritatta" for the affection of a women he calls "the human garbage can." Bobby Lee was also hilarious as Lee Wei Lee. Watching him dump noodles on his head and laugh like a baby had me laughing way too hard.

Taco will always have some of the funniest lines in the show for me, mainly because he says them so casually and they can sometimes go unappreciated. For example, how he kept telling Kevin that he didn't actually love him, and when told Jenny that she wasn't with a "real man." His insults come off so calmly and sound like normal conversation, but that's what make them Taco's. However, I will never understand how he thought it was smart to put weed in a spice jar...I mean I know it's Taco, but still.

Favorite Lines from "Epi-Sexy"

Taco: "I thought the only disease that's was good for sex was low self-esteem."

Andre: "I think it was kind of a daredevil thing, I felt by sonar."

Rafi: "You know what else feels good? Someone's mouth on my weiner."

Rafi to Pete: "Is this your pocket dog?"

Rafi: "Meanwhile, I'm riding a ten-speed that I stole from an eleven year old."

Rafi to Gale: "Does he spend every waking minute of his life stalking you?"

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Make sure to come back next week as I recap another episode of THE LEAGUE, and be sure to leave your comments on this week's episode below, or tweet me at @k8linmilligan! Stay Shiva my friends!

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