BWW Recap: SURVIVOR- BLOOD VS WATER 11/12; Full Results!

As I reflect on this season of SURVIVOR, the road so far, if you will, a couple of things are shocking to me. Number one: We're already down to 11 contestants. Number two: We're only down to 11 contestants. What is that, an oxymoron? Situational irony? Antithesis? Somewhere, both of my parents are weeping over my clearly wasted English degree. Well, anyway, whatever it is, it's true. Is this season moving at lightning speed, or in slow motion? Or both? I simply can't tell. Stick it on the bookshelf of unsolved mysteries, right between Roanoke and the Bermuda triangle.

On tonight's episode, alliances will be questioned on the newly merged Huyopa tribe. (Teehee. "Huyopa." How goofy.) Y'know. Your typical island hijinx. When you're fighting for a million dollars, where do your allegiances lie? With your boyfriend? Your gal pals? Members of your original tribe? It's tough. Like running-out-of-rice-and- losing-your-flint tough. And for Jaclyn, it's about to get even tougher. Does she stay loyal to Jon, or ditch him and the rest of the boys to form an all-girl alliance? I don't really foresee her abandoning her boyfriend, but the notion of an all-girl alliance is kind of nice. Traditonally, they aren't very successful--check the tomes of reality tv lore, you'll see what I mean--but I can still hope. There's only 4 girls left now, so it's even more unlikely...even more awesome if it works.

What alliances would you like to see on the new Huyopa tribe? Which contestant will be voted out at tonight's tribal council?

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8:01 Julie picked probably the worst time to randomly up and quit. Last week's tribal council would have been an imortant one. Drawing the line in the sand and everything. I wonder if Jon wil take her disappearing act as like...y'know, a sign from up above. He was essentially given one more week to consider a potential alliance with Josh. Or maybe he won't even notice. Fingers crossed.

8:06 SURVIVOR, honey, you know I love you, but every single one of your challenges is, more or less, the same exact thing. Some variation of running/swimming/crawling/climbing some distance and then putting together a puzzle. Oh yeah. And raising a flag. That all you got? Let's see some creativity this 29th time around! ...Although to be fair, don't look to me for suggestions, 'cuz I got none. I'm just here for the snarky commentary.

Bless Jeff's heart for trying to create the illusion of suspsense during this reward comp. The yellow team is, like, literally done, and he's still thinking the blue team could maybe possibly...win somehow? Can they do it?! No, of course they can't, Probst, open you eyes, man!

8:17 Aw, Reed, that's cute. Tribal homeostasis. #Huyopeostasis. This is beautiful. Let's all just get drunk, eat tacos, and talk strategy. The true Survivor way.

At this point, Josh, I'm pretty fed up with Baylor too. I love her being like, "Well, I'm a Christian. I was taught to give gifts without expecting anything in return." Um. Okay. You know you're on Survivor, right?

How do people find these idols?! How?!

8:29 Oh my gosh, guys, I live for Jeremy's sass. "What're y'all doin'?! Have some manners!" But really though. Keith, Wes, and Alec, are, er, gross.

Here we go, another generic immunity comp. Will it be a quiz of some sort? Or perhaps an endurance challenge? Lay it on me, Probst! Ah yes, the traditional memorize-a-sequence-of-thingamabobs-then-repeat-the-thingamabobs-back-to-me-in-the-correct-order challenge. Try saying that five times fast. These comps are always so stressful for me to watch. I end up playing along whether I like it or not, The mind wants what the mind wants, sometimes.

Eek, Josh vs Jeremy--this is nervewracking. Like, c'mon, Papa Probst, you don't even know. OH NO. Disaster on the island, dear readers! Josh loses, so now Jeremy has immunity. THIS IS POTENTIALLY PROBLEMATIC.

8:42 I'm worried, you guys. I'm real worried. Now that Jeremy's safe...I really don't want Josh to go. To be honest, I'd love to see Alec randomly get voted out. That'd be nice. Doubtful, but nice. And it's funny that Jon's already thinking about the final three. There are eleven of you left, dude. Chillax a second. Also, the concept of breaking up pairs hasn't really been brought up yet, which is strange to me. Those are built-in alliances that you should try to dismantle pronto, no?

Look at poor Josh going all Lil' Red Riding Hood at tonight's tribal. How could you vote out that face?

Shut up, Alec. (no context necessary)

Nooooooooo, Joshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! Oh wow, I'm so upset! Gone way too soon, but at least he made it to the jury. I MEAN, I GUESS, BUT I'M STILL AWFULLY SAD.

Were you shocked by tonight's tribal council? How will Josh's absence affect Reed's gameplay next week?

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Photo Credit: Monty Brinton | CBS

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