BWW Cooks: Halloween Candy and Homemade Treats

Ah, Halloween, the sweetest holiday of all. When else can children go around demanding candy from adults and hear the words, "sure, here you go!" The candy and snack haul that gaily-costumed toddlers collect is presented to each other, the winner the one either with the most loot, or the most GOOD loot. Because, face it, all candy is not created equal, especially to trick-or-treaters. Many slightly older children will remember from year to year which houses have the good stuff - brand name chocolate bars, full-size candy treats, and so on - and who gives out the sucky candy. I know I mapped out routes in my head to the houses that gave away the most, best stuff, my own definition of "the good stuff" being Reese's cups, especially the full-size ones.

One of the historic variants of today's trick-or-treat candy grab was the hunt for "soul cakes" that were given away in England, Scotland, and Wales on All Hallows' Eve, All Saints Day, and All Souls Day. Soul cakes were small spiced cakes given to those who came by and promised to pray for the deceased members of the gifter's family, as well as for the gifter and their living relatives. References to soul cakes date back to Shakespeare, and the practice itself appears to date back into the Middle Ages. Soul cakes were usually spiced with such fine spices as cinnamon, ginger, cloves, allspice, and nutmeg, and studded with raisins - in essence, a large, soft, raisin spice cookie. Though many trick or treat consumers and their parents refuse to touch homemade food gifts any more (a shame, since the infamous poisoned candies and razor-studded apples are urban myth far more than any reality), soul cakes might liven up a Halloween party, especially with some chopped walnuts thrown in for good measure. Use any good, soft raisin cookie recipe (oatmeal raisin, however, isn't traditional).

The great American Halloween homemade food item is the popcorn ball - and indeed, what's more American than corn? If you're no candy maker and you hate boiling corn syrup and sugar to hard-ball consistency, or you're leery of trying, a ten-ounce bag of marshmallows, melted, can be combined with half a cup of popping corn (pop it before making your balls!) or a 3.5 ounce bag, popped, of microwave corn, and ¼ cup (half a stick) of real butter, melted. Mix them all together and bam, instant popcorn balls without cooking down your syrup. Mix in mini M&Ms or other candies for color and flavor. You could use candy corn, which looks great, but isn't always a winner. For trick-or-treat events, pre-wrapped, sealed, pre-made popcorn balls are available, sure, but they taste like mildly sweetened cardboard, and what's better than homemade, fresh, popcorn balls? The Rice Krispies treats concept gives you a fresh, crunchy popcorn ball treat that's only a little more work than the bar treats and is also gluten-free. Substitute a dairy-free margarine and you've knocked out most allergens. Use kosher marshmallows, or vegan ones, and you'll have a fairly clean sweep with these treats (just don't use dairy-containing microwave popcorn if you're going dairy-free).

Now, all of this useful information avoided the dreaded question - what to give as trick-or-treat candy. Do you want to be the cool house or the loser house this year? Coolness requires avoiding both ends of the spectrum. Most toddlers through young teens are not looking for Green and Black's 70 percent organic dark cocoa bars. Nor do they come seeking Scharfen Berger milk chocolate miniatures. Even such unabashedly commercial goodies as Lindt truffles wrapped in orange or Ghirardelli squares filled with caramel or mint do not satisfy this crowd, although their parents who raid their stash (come on, everyone filches the kids' chocolates) might appreciate them. The kids may hand them over to you directly. Artisanal chocolates? Commercial pseudo-artisanal chocolates? Uncool. On the other hand, dollar-store Palmer's chocolate peanut butter coins with pumpkins and mummies on them? Even young children know these aren't the good stuff. Oh, they'll eat them, sure. It's better than - well, we'll get there.

Coolness requires name-brand candies, and for most children without allergies, this means chocolate. CHOCOLATE. MILK chocolate, alas. And you have a choice of four, exactly four, true coolnesses according to my younger sources: the Hershey assorted chocolates, the Mars chocolates (not including Dove chocolate, please), Nestle assortments, and Reese's assortments. Not for this crowd the Cadbury fruit and nut or Dairy Milk. Not your good Canadian Kit-Kats. The members of the juvenile candy-eating association have almost always settled on their own favorites already, be they Mr. Goodbar minis, Reese's cups, Snickers, M&Ms, or Nestles's Crunch.

You will be rated for having one or more of these kinds of name brand chocolates, and don't think the caped candy crusaders don't know their Hershey products from their Mars bars, because they've already got their brand loyalties in chocolate established. The kids who want Dove dark chocolate, Scharfen Berger, or something else that you'd like yourself are ones who won't be trick-or-treating, because you can't give away popular chocolates to a junior foodie. (Okay, I liked dark chocolate but I also still ate Reese's cups like they were going to be banned the next week, but my taste was always eclectic - I'll still as soon run to a Waffle House as to a four-star restaurant, because the four-star place doesn't do scattered, smothered, and covered hash browns with Tabasco sauce. And if you have never eaten this specially delicious food, I feel sorry for you.)

If you have chocolate, nut, gluten or dairy allergies to watch out for among your candy-grabbing crew, Wrigley's chewing gums and Dubble Bubble bubble gum avoid all of these, so keep a small stash around. Skittles also avoid the major allergens as well as having an air of candy class to them. Packets of Jelly Belly jelly beans, Nerds, and Smarties rolls also avoid these issues, and are well-received by the sugar-lovers out there.

What does the crowd not want? What will make you participatory, but unpopular enough to be avoided by everyone after a few years? Online polls suggest that the top item nobody wants is candy corn, followed by the little orange candy pumpkins that taste just like candy corn. Also unpopular: Good and Plenty, Dum Dums pops and other lollipops, "old fashioned" penny candies (Mary Janes, Bit O'Honey, and the like)... and, surprisingly, any size of Tootsie Roll. Twizzlers are intermediately disliked, the red apparently more popular. And don't even think about Laffy Taffy, especially the banana stuff.

And don't you dare try to cop out by handing out stuff instead of candy. Kids are very exacting. Pencils and glo-sticks tossed in the pumpkin or cauldron don't cut it... and if you drop in a religious tract, as some people do, you may find yourself asked out loud by parents to not participate the next year. No matter how much you'd like to save the little goblins' teeth or souls - especially their souls - your gesture will not be appreciated. If you're handing out religious tracts, they won't be appreciated even if you give full-size Hershey bars along with them.

Keep trick or treat treats simple. Keep them pre-packaged. Keep them name brand candy. And indulge the fun recipes at the Halloween party, where your mini M&M popcorn balls and soul cakes will make you as much of a hit as your new Cleopatra costume will.

Photo Credit: Freeimages.com

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