STEP OFF: Double/Deserved Elimination on DANCING WITH THE STARS

After last night's opening to Iconic Dance Week on DANCING WITH THE STARS, Bristol Palin and Mark Ballas found themselves shuffling their tap shoes, heads down in defeat at the bottom of the score board. After hearing some viewers' opinions on her performance/personality, Bristol (like her mother) seems to suffer from the "Palin Syndrome": a pop culture infection that makes everyone wish you would go away.

But did Bristol's tantrum in rehearsal cause enough flack for DANCING viewers to give her the boot? Well, just read on, dear reader. You'll find out.

On tonight's episode, two All-Stars were dutifully eliminated. The lowest scoring couples thus far in the competition are Kelly Monaco and Val Chmerkovskiy with 43 total points, Kirstie Alley and Maksim Chmerkovskiy with 40, and Bristol Palin and Mark Ballas with 37.5 points.

That's the basic gist of what you need to know to make a prediction - right? But hey. Do we ever really know who's going to land the votes? Some people love a good laugh. Which might explain why Palin is still prancin' right along. Anyway, there was a whole lot of exorbitant recapping happening on tonight's elimination episode - so for the sake of our sanity, let's not recap the recap.

The contestants were broken into groups, the groups all cried (almost) - and Kirstie Alley and Drew Lachey were lumped together in jeopardy. Moving right along…

ATTENTION EVERYBODY: The first couple eliminated is Drew Lachey and Anna Trebunskaya. Which is slightly surprising, considering Lachey won season 2 of the show. Kirstie, you can stay.

Oh, and here's something new: for the first time, the contestants will be choosing the other contestants' dances for the week. They're detailed below:

Gilles Marini and Peta Murgatroyd: Bollywood. Chosen by Bristol and Mark.
Sabrina Bryan and Louis Van Amstel: Disco. Chosen by Kirstie and Maksim.
Shawn Johnson and Derek Hough: Mambo. Chosen by Helio and Chelsie.
Emmitt Smith and Cheryl Burke: Bolero. Chosen by Kelly and Val.
Apolo Anton Ohno and Karina Smirnoff: Hip Hop. Chosen by Melissa and Tony.
Melissa Rycroft and Tony Dovolani: Jitterbug. Chosen by Apolo and Karina.
Kelly Monaco and Val Chmerkovskiy: Contemporary. Chosen by Emmitt and Cheryl.
Helio Castroneves and Chelsie Hightower: Broadway. Chosen by Shawn and Derek.
Kirstie Alley and Maksim Chmerkovskiy: Charleston. Chosen by Sabrina.
Bristol Palin and Mark Ballas get Rock and Roll. Because they're last.

The second group of contestants included Bristol. The jeopardy group did not. And thus, America must endure the stomping of Reagan's little angel for yet another week.

Instead, it was Sabrina Bryan (Dumb. She can actually dance.) and Helio Castroneves. Bryan was declared safe, and Castroneves was released of his duties to mildly entertain the masses.

And then there were 9. UGH. Still so many. There should, for real, be a mass elimination in which half of the contestants are booted, so only the awesome dancers remain. Also, the funny ones. So Kirstie Alley, I guess.

DANCING WITH THE STARS returns next week at 8PM E/P on ABC - with BroadwayWorld's recap right on its heels.