Martini Talk: Attend The Tale Of Songs That Were Cut

Admit it!  As you wandered into whatever movie theatre you visited this past week to see Sweeney Todd, at some point or another you found yourself humming or singing a bit of "Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd…" knowing darn well that "The Ballad of Sweeney Todd," save for some snatches of incidental music here and there, would not be a part of your next two hours of entertainment.  Musical theatre lovers eventually grow accustomed to the fact that most film versions of their favorite shows are not going to be exact replicas of their Broadway experiences, and while some still morn the exclusion of "The Big Doll House" from Hairspray and "The King Of Broadway" from The Producers, others, like myself, prefer to assemble lists like…

My Ten (plus several more) Favorite Theatre Songs That Were Excluded From The Movie Version:

10.  "Tchaikovsky (And Other Russians)" from Lady In The Dark:  Danny Kaye stopped the show nightly singing the names of fifty Russian composers in less than 40 seconds, but when Paramount made the movie Kaye was signed to MGM, so Mischa Auer, who specialized in playing "Mad Russian" comedy parts got the role, but not the song.

9.  "Lonely Room" from Oklahoma!:  This one was almost cut from the show even before out-of-town previews began because Howard da Silva, the original Jud Fry, was having trouble singing it.  Alfred Drake graciously coached him and it remains to this day an outstanding example of musical theatre dramatic soliloquy.  I guess Drake wasn't there to help out Rod Steiger when the time came to film it.

8.  "Cool, Cool, Considerate Men" from 1776:  Richard M. Nixon's least favorite showtune, was cut from 1776 when it played a command performance at The White House, due to its critical view of the conservative side of our founding fathers.  It's said the president even had a hand in seeing that the number was cut from the 1971 film.  Fortunately, the magnificently staged scene can be seen on the director's cut DVD.

7.  "Before I Gaze At You Again" from Camelot:  Yeah, yeah, I know… The Camelot song most of you would have picked would have been "Fie On Goodness."  Or maybe "The Seven Deadly Virtues."  Both are terrific, but my preference is for this gorgeous ballad where Guinevere tries to deny her growing feelings for Lancelot out of loyalty to her devoted husband.  And just imagine how lovely Vanessa Redgrave would have...  Ummm, maybe it was a good thing they cut that one.

6.  "Class" from Chicago:  When the best song in the show doesn't fit your concept you might want to consider changing your concept.

5.  "How Can Love Survive?" from The Sound Of Music: The funniest lyric Oscar Hammerstein ever wrote sounds remarkably like it might have been ghost-written by Lorenz Hart.

4.  The entire score of Fifty Million Frenchmen: Cole Porter's smash hit of 1929 featured classics like "You Do Something To Me," "I'm Unlucky At Gambling," "Find Me A Primitive Man" and "The Tale Of The Oyster," but by the time it was being filmed in 1931 sagging business had convinced the brains in Hollywood that Americans were no longer interested in movie musicals, so the songs were removed from all prints released in the U.S.  Broadway leading man William Gaxton, signed to repeat his starring role, found his vehicle was reduced to an hour-long non-musical flick intended to showcase the new comedy team of Olsen and Johnson.  The songs remained in prints sent to be screened outside the U.S. but none are known to survive.

3.  Nearly the entire score of On The Town:  When asked why MGM dropped every song from the exuberantly New York score of On The Town, with the exception of "New York, New York" (with its opening hymn for early-risers "I Feel Like I'm Not Out Of Bed Yet") and "Come Up To My Place," Adolph Green plainly answered, "Because they were silly!"  I'd say "silly" is too kind a word for someone who would deny the movie-going public "Carried Away," "Lonely Town," "Lucky To Be Me," "I Can Cook, Too," and "Some Other Time."

2.  "Another Op'nin, Another Show" from Kiss Me, Kate:  In one of the strangest moves ever in adapting a hit musical into a film, Kiss Me, Kate's op'nin number was removed in favor of a scene where Fred and Lili (Howard Keel and Katherine Grayson) meet in a fashionable New York apartment with Cole Porter (played by Ron Randall) to hear the score for his new musical version of The Taming of The Shrew.  After they sing through "So In Love," Ann Miller barges in with  her own jazz ensemble and tap dances on the coffee table to "Too Darn Hot."

1. "My Funny Valentine" from Babes In Arms:  One of the the most popular songs ever written for Broadway, "My Funny Valentine," along with "Johnny One-Note," "The Lady Is A Tramp" and "I Wish I Were In Love Again" were axed from the score when Babes In Arms was revised as a big screen vehicle for Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland.  The Rodgers and Hart songs were considered too sophisticated for the young stars.

There are plenty more to pick from.  Tell me some of your favorite showtunes that were omitted from the movie version.

Michael Dale's Martini Talk appears every Monday and Thursday on BroadwayWorld.com.