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BroadwayGirlNYC: 'But He Doesn't Love Broadway!' - A Dating Dealbeaker?

By: Mar. 18, 2010
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Recently the lovely @Vyckster tweeted, "Daughter tried to show new boyfriend her Playbill collection.  He declined. I see a doomed relationship in her future".

My first reaction was to cry out "That's a dealbreaker, ladies!" about dating someone who isn't a fellow theatre-nut.  But when I really started to think about it, I concluded that I might not feel that way after all.

For those of us who geek out hardcore about Broadway, it's difficult to imagine how anyone couldn't.  We track our favorite stars' careers, we plan our schedules around the shows we haven't seen, and we spend a fortune on those gorgeous archival-quality Playbill binders so our mementos will always stay pristine. We also often happen to be romantics – and the idea of finding a partner with similar, singular passion for the theatre seems like the only way we'll ever know true love. 

But consider this:

A great performance, like a great love affair, can be all-consuming – overwhelming, even, when it's at its best. I think that's why I've begun enjoying my solo outings more and more over the past couple of years: I get to have a romance with the play or musical itself.  Which means, I've found, that I don't need one as much with the person sitting next to me.

One of my best dating experiences was with a guy who had (gasp!) never been to a Broadway show (his interests were computer science and sports).  One day early in our relationship, I nervously invited him to see RENT with me on Broadway.  It was my favorite show at the time and I felt it had molded a lot of my life philosophy.  Sharing it with him was about more than just an evening activity – I was showing him a piece of my soul, and giving him permission to accept or reject that offering.  Much to my delight, he agreed gladly – eager to share something he knew was important to me.  His response was "I can't imagine anything better than watching you, watching something you enjoy so much."  And guess what?  He loved the show.  And it wasn't (by a long shot) the last theatrical date-night we shared.

Did he become a hardcore theatre nerd like I am?  No, but that's okay.  Similarly, while I was happy to don his team's colors on ballgame days, I didn't come close to becoming a crazy sports fan the way he was.  The fact is, we loved meeting up to share our excitement – even if we were geeking out about vastly different passions.

Please don't misconstrue; I could never be with someone who scoffed at my love for Broadway.  On the contrary, I seek a partner who can appreciate my fixation with healthy respect.  But needing someone who finds value in my obsession isn't the same as requiring him to match it. He just has to listen and smile while I regale him with my tales of adventure on the Great White Way.

PSSSST (Rumors! Gossip! Scoop!): A former West Side boy may be catching the Priscilla bus when it heads to Broadway…. And – will an original principal or two from Rock of Ages be heading out on tour after all?




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