Cringeworthy Lyrics

[GlindatheGood22]

I know it's easy to pick on Carrie, but I just really have a problem with, "I prayed this day would never come/ I should have know/ I should have known/ Now I'm alone."

And, as much as I love Newsies and King of New York - "This is gonna make both the Delanceys pee in their pantsies."

[bdn223]

Galindathegood I have to agree a lot of Newsies lyrics take out of context are cringe worthy, but when you think about it the entire cast with the exception of Metalarkin, Kathrine, Pulitzer and his cronies, and possibly David, don't have more than an elementary school education so it makes perfect sense that they are using the most basic vocabulary. After all most of them can't even read the papers their selling.

[suttonfoster]

why has NO ONE mentioned "There's a chip on my shoulder and it's as big as a boulder" CMON

[Wynbish]

Addams Family:

I wanna demonstrate that fear is my ideal/
Girl believe me fear is your ideal/
Cause in the moment that you're frightened life is real/
Then my life must be real real!

[onedaymore]

From Maury Yeston's Phantom...

"It must be seen like a torch,
we'll engrave it on the porch!"

Really? Engrave it on the porch? That's the best you can do to make yourself known?

[The Scorpion]

Can't believe someone hasn't mentioned this yet:

From Jesus Christ Superstar:

"Always hoped that I'd be an apostle
Knew that I would make it if I tried
Then when we retire we can write the gospels
So they'll still talk about us when we've died"

There is absolutely no way any director or any cast could make that stanza work. EVER. So weird.

I love those! It's typical Tim Rice. I have a feeling his wit and sense of humour, which is admittedly very English, just doesn't translate that well across the pond where he's considerably more bashed for what in Britain are generally considered rather witty lyrics.

Another cringeworthy lyric that comes to mind, this time from Wicked:

"There are bridges you cross
You didn't know you crossed
Until you've crossed"

[After Eight]

I heard this one on the Tony Awards show and busted out laughing in disbelief:

"I'm walking on moonbeams."

Uh, message to Once songwriters: It's 2012 now, not 1912.

[henrikegerman]

"I always thought that Chapter Three was WAY too early for that particular sort of reveal. He just need an ee rhyme."

Owen, I think you;re being too literal; it really doesn't matter if chapter three is too early.

Lyrics are meant to take liberties. For instance, it is silly to complain that "This Can't Be Love" starts with "In Verona my late cousin Romeo," because Antipholus being an ancient couldn't have possibly known Romeo; it's wit. And one suspends disbelief just as one does in accepting that a character is bursting into song. While the fact that Romeo rhymes with Dromio inform the choice of the lyric, it doesn't diminish it.

[finebydesign]

From Aida:

I appreciate too well, the squalor at which you excel
It isn't very hard to tell, evil's a distinctive smell

[Roscoe]

From THE PIRATE QUEEN, the song "Boys Will Be Boys":

She's confused about gender
She been too long "at sea"
I may well have to beach her
Take her inland and teach her
What a woman should be.

[Owen22]

"Lyrics are meant to take liberties."

No, they're not. ????? Wha?????

[michellek45]

My favorite isn't really a lyric, it's from one of the spoken parts of "I'm On My Way" from Paint Your Wagon: "C'mon, little banjo, lead me to the rainbow!" or something similar. I laugh every time I hear that one.

[somethininthestars]

How can you top this?

I got Brooklyn in the blood
Racing through my veins.
Roaming through my body like a subway train.

Brooklyn in the blood sounds like something maybe a little penicillin might clear up. And why o why is it not RUNNING through my body like a subway train (or better yet, running through my veins, RACING[...] like a subway train)? I hope the subway trains aren't roaming... (imean, i know sometimes you have to go backwards to go forwards, but still) Taxis can roam, i think subways had best stick to their route.

[After Eight]

In conjunction with the new Merrily We Roll Along recording, there's the endless droning of "day after day, after day, after day......"

Hey, Frank, the audience doesn't have all day to listen to this....

Nor does it want to.

[emlodik]

The entire "Wizard and Me" song from "Wicked." I just can't get through it, it's the Holocaust of the English language.

[g.d.e.l.g.i.]

I admit to cringing at a lot of Tim Rice's lines in JCS, much as I love the show. "This common crowd / Is much too loud..." *cringe* "What's that in the bread! / It's gone to my head..." *cringe* In fact, one could start a drinking game on rhymes like that.

[boggess]

Not the worst, but I hate in Les Mis when they sing Eponine as "Ponine".

Once more 'Ponine saving the day
Dearest Cosette, my friend 'Ponine

[LuminousBeing]

I love Sondheim more than chocolate, but every time I get to "could've turned him into STONE! Or a DOG! Or a CHAIR!" when watching the "Into the Woods" DVD, I cringe.

[lizabombs]

A few Sondheim lyrics that I hate:

"Wishes are children."

Just insipid. And the rest of "Children Will Listen" isn't that hot, either.

"And me and you
We'll be singing it like the birds
Me with music
And you the words"

Ouch. Is it just me, or does "birds" not REALLY rhyme with "words." It forces the singer to pronounce "words" and "werds" and it just makes me shiver with embarrassment.

Almost anything the solders sing in "Passion" is cringe-worthy, too, especially:

"Uniforms! Uniforms!"

[qolbinau]

Birds sounds like a pretty fine rhyme of Words to me, at least in my Australian accent.

[erikinthecity2]

Side Show -

"Now I am the one blushing red eating humble pie."

[Wynbish]

"Feast my friend, enjoy your little dinner.
And pay attention now, you little dickens!
This is where the story will get interesting.
As we Italians say, 'the plot she thickens!'"

Woman in White