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What Was The Worst Piece Of Theatrical Trash You Sat Through This Year?

PTOPhan
Understudy
joined:6/5/12
I wouldn't call it trash because it was well-acted and well-sung, but "Jekyll & Hyde" disappointed me terribly. The real problem with it is that the story is so dated. I'd much rather see some nuances to both Jekyll and Hyde, instead of having one character be completely good and the other completely evil. Also, rather than having the story be completely escapist, I'd love to see it raise some modern moral questions. For example, how about having Jekyll be gay and Hyde be straight and having some fools embrace Hyde as "the good guy" because they're prejudiced against Jekyll?

My point is that I think that the story is too simplistic to be engaging. I hate spending $95 for a show and the next day, I feel as if I haven't even been to the theater.
You alone can make my song take flight.
NYadgal
Broadway Legend
joined:5/18/04
I'm not a fan of the word 'trash'.

But, the most painful theatrical experience for me last year was "If There Is I Haven't Found It Yet".

I regret giving up that part of my life.
"Two drifters off to see the world... there's such a lot of world to see"
grumpyoptimist
Stand-by
joined:2/26/11
Uh oh. Prepare for Gyllith force field :)
vegas2
Stand-by
joined:12/5/09
The Anarchist. Nothing else even came close.
anthony95401
Swing
joined:11/28/10
While I would never want to call any creative endeavor that someone worked very hard on "trash" (no matter what the outcome), I would have to say it was an off, off, off, off, Broadway musical called "Honestly Abe". I got tickets on TDF and thought "how bad could it be?" Oh my God. God love 'em, the young cast gave it their all, but they were all VERY green, the music was canned, and nothing about this show was ready to be seen. The songs, the book, the staging....it was all so bad it was Guffman-esque. I try to be supportive of developing work, but this show really was FAR from ready... for anything. My apologies to anyone reading this who may have been involved, but it's the truth.
Malone With An N
Swing
joined:12/28/12
Thank you so much for this review. We hijacked it and called it our own for the Bluray DVD release. I only wish you could have mentioned it before X-mas....Oh what a gift that would have been. Oh well, Happy New Year! Check out the trailer with your review here: http://youtu.be/xouCGrG4X3w
xxx NOMI

Showgirls the Musical DVD...this spring. xxx
adam.peterson44
Featured Actor
joined:9/7/11
For me, it was the national tour of American Idiot. Insanely loud "music"-substitute noise, blaring lights pointed into the audience's eyes on a regular basis to blind us so that we wouldn't notice the rubbish onstage in front of us, unintelligible lyrics, "choreography" that consisted of nothing but repetitive seizure-like thrashing about, unlikeable characters with no emotional connection to the audience/reason to care about any of them. There is no sum of money that I could be offered that would make me agree to sacrifice 3 more hours of my life to watch it again.

In NYC, my least favorite show that I saw this year was Leap of Faith. Enjoyed everything else that I saw at least a little bit.
songanddanceman2
Broadway Legend
joined:8/31/06
I like that the Showgirls the Musical team are basking in how horrid it apparently is. That is not a good thing, if you are gonna take a camp classic like Showgirls which people love watching and make it unwatchable then you have failed on a spectacular level. Just because you put bad quotes on the lousy trailer does not make it 'self aware' etc, nobody set out on that show to create something unwatchable I'm sure. So just admit that you messed up horribly and are now trying to save face like that was the 'plan'

Namo i love u but we get it already....you don't like Madonna
yankeefan7
Broadway Star
joined:4/14/12
Since I only saw two shows (West End) last year and enjoyed them both, my answer is "none" - lol.
Malone With An N
Swing
joined:12/28/12
songanddanceman2- It was actually just ONE quote.(from this message board, actually) We were hardly unwatchable. A sold out run...great reviews...and a TON of fun. We did what we came to do. No face to save here. It was AMAZING, darlin'!

P.S. Who still uses message boards in 2013??? The only reason we are here is Google Alerts for our "theatrical trash" show. Thanks Viseral dude!
Jordan Catalano
Broadway Legend
joined:10/9/05
A couple things -

1) I can't wait to see this SHOWGIRLS when the DVD is released.

2) I'm happy my term "theatrical trash" made it onto your promo, een if it wasn't referring to your show, specifically.

3) Its 2013 so a lot of people use message boards. That makes absolutely no sense. If you said "it's 1987! Who uses message boards?", than that would make sense but insulting people who would probably be interested in buying your product makes is just silly.
"I think Glee is way too sharp, smart, witty, clever and emotionally confronting for the masses." - Dave19 - "What's next? Snow Black and the 7 Swaggers? Shasquirta and the Beast? 101 Weavematians? Willis in Ghettoland?" - Dave19, in reference to the new ANNIE remake.
Malone With An N
Swing
joined:12/28/12
Jordan Catalano- Thanks! I think I may have to get you a "gratis" copy. Love the profile pic!

xxx Nomi & Co.

Owen22
Broadway Star
joined:2/24/11
Ghost Brothers of Darkland County at the Alliance. Piece of sh*t.
Mister Matt
Broadway Legend
joined:5/17/03
Insanely loud "music"-substitute noise, blaring lights pointed into the audience's eyes on a regular basis to blind us so that we wouldn't notice the rubbish onstage in front of us, unintelligible lyrics, "choreography" that consisted of nothing but repetitive seizure-like thrashing about, unlikeable characters with no emotional connection to the audience/reason to care about any of them.

Wow. I don't think I've ever read any review that was the exact polar opposite of my experience before. Except maybe Jordan Catalano's comments about Legally Blonde, but that doesn't count because I know he secretly loved it and performs So Much Better at the top of his lungs in a lycra onesie after downing a four pack of wine coolers when home alone.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
Jordan Catalano
Broadway Legend
joined:10/9/05
I don't remember my review for LEGALLY BLONDE but I can tell you that I would rather set my ears on fire while having sex with a barbed wire vagina while at the same time being anally violated by a razor blade infused pineapple than have to listen to that "score" again.

"I think Glee is way too sharp, smart, witty, clever and emotionally confronting for the masses." - Dave19 - "What's next? Snow Black and the 7 Swaggers? Shasquirta and the Beast? 101 Weavematians? Willis in Ghettoland?" - Dave19, in reference to the new ANNIE remake.
Mr Roxy
Broadway Legend
joined:5/17/03
Another vote for The Anarchist. Mercifully it was short
Is it true cannibals do not eat clowns because they taste funny? George Carlin
songanddanceman2
Broadway Legend
joined:8/31/06
Miser Matt, i agree with you on both counts.

Malone With An N the reviews? i would love to read one, i just heard from a few different people it was awful. I'm sure it was wonderful though. My company here in the UK is producing Showgirls in stage in 2014, guess we will be in competition
Namo i love u but we get it already....you don't like Madonna
SNAFU
Broadway Legend
joined:4/20/04
"Wow. I don't think I've ever read any review that was the exact polar opposite of my experience before."

Funny, I couldn't agree more with adam's comment and I saw invited dress on Broadway! Couldn't wait to leave the theatre, found the assault on my eyes and ears unforgivable.

Mister Matt
Broadway Legend
joined:5/17/03
Shhhh, Jordan...I'm enjoying my own mental picture and now it's my truth. Don't interrupt.
"What can you expect from a bunch of seitan worshippers?" - Reginald Tresilian
adam.peterson44
Featured Actor
joined:9/7/11
Well, Mister Matt, for what it's worth, i thoroughly enjoyed Legally Blonde, and in particular loved the song "So Much Better", so at least we can agree on something. :)
ooblogway
Understudy
joined:5/20/07
Broadway: The Anarchist - jaw-droppingly bad

Off-Broadway: Medieval Play - had I been sitting on the aisle, I wouldn't have waited for intermission to leave.
lightguy06222
Broadway Star
joined:12/3/06
Magic/Bird, Leap of Faith, Scandalous, BARE, Bullet for Adolph, The Golden Land, Last Smoker in America, Look Back in Anger.

All a hot mess.

I walked out of all of them.

I found GHOST to be terrible, but tolerable.
Moving to NYC Sept 2nd. Looking forward to seeing American Idion, Aadams Family, Fela!, La Cage Aux Folles, Little Night Music, Memphis, Million Dollar Quartet, Promises Promises, Wintuk
Jordan Catalano
Broadway Legend
joined:10/9/05
I don't get the hate for MAGIC/BIRD. It wasn't an amazing show but for te simple little thing it was, I didn't think it was bad at all.
"I think Glee is way too sharp, smart, witty, clever and emotionally confronting for the masses." - Dave19 - "What's next? Snow Black and the 7 Swaggers? Shasquirta and the Beast? 101 Weavematians? Willis in Ghettoland?" - Dave19, in reference to the new ANNIE remake.
HauteCraigture
Swing
joined:3/27/12
The Performers. I'm not surprised it closed in a week.
After Eight
Broadway Legend
joined:6/5/09
^

I'm surprised it was even produced.

4
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